The Big Bang

The Big Bang

by | June 9, 2014 | Learning to Listen, Power of Relationships | 1 comment

On the table sat a plastic box that I bought a little over 20 years ago. It was scraped and scratched from all the years of being moved. The lid was dusty and the sides were a little dirty. We had placed it under the stairs when we moved into the house seven years ago. I don’t think it has been touched since then. On it’s side was a label that read “When Caitlyn is 21.”

Every now and then I would come across the box while cleaning the garage or moving. I remembered that gifts were wrapped and letters written to the future 21 year old Caitlyn.

Then, last week one of Jan’s best friends, Bev, came over to help us get ready for Jan’s mom’s 75th birthday party. Jan’s mom, Jean Anne, has had Parkinson’s for 30 years. She’s been in a wheel chair for a while now and speaking is extremely difficult. While making decorations for the party, Bev asked Caitlyn if she had opened her time capsule when she turned 21 in February. We had all completely forgotten about it. So we pulled it out from under the stairs, dust, scratches, cobwebs and all.

I sat on the sofa with Jan and Bev watching Caitlyn take off the lid and start to open the packages and read the cards and letters that were in the box. One perfectly wrapped gift held silver plated spoons that were made in 1867. It was a gift from Jean Anne, Caitlyn’s Grandma whose birthday we were celebrating. As Caitlyn began to read the typed letter, I could see the tears welling in her eyes. Of course, I knew what that meant. As my wife is famous for saying “No one cries alone around me”. Tears were running down Jan’s smiling face.

As Caitlyn finished haltingly reading the letter between tears, she said in an amazement, “I could hear grandma’s voice, just like she was talking to me.” I felt the same way. Everything she wished for Caitlyn were also my wishes. It’s as if Caitlyn had been reading a letter written by me. But what I heard was a voice I had not heard in years due to the Parkinson’s.

The last letter was from Margret, one of Jan’s old bosses. I had not seen Margret in so long it took a few minutes to remember who she was. Her words of admiration for Caitlyn about the depth of love that she saw coming from Jan and I hit me hard.

I never forget how much I love my children. But sometimes I feel that I get lost in all of the complexity that comes with children who are young adults.

The right words truly escape me here, so please bear with my fumbling.

Hearing Caitlyn’s letters woke up the simple and awe inspiring feeling of love that I had as a new parent. Each birth another Big Bang; reminding me of life’s limitless potential.

Jean Anne and Margret’s voices from the past opened my ears to the echoing of those first times I held my daughters in my arms and looked upon their faces with marvel at the creation I was a part of.

Just like cosmology, it’s so easy for me to get caught up in the details that I seemingly lose sight of the wonder right in front of me. Being reminded of this put all the details I worry about into perfect order. Just like this amazing universe I live in and my wife and two beautiful daughters, it all fell into place.

Jim Dwyer

Jim Dwyer

I think of myself as part lawyer, seeker and sharer. We are all so busy taking care of our clients and the many demands of being a lawyer, how do we have time for the practice of law to be about more?

To me, the purpose of being a lawyer is not just about how I help my clients. It’s equally about me living the most successful inner personal life I can. If I can infuse who I uniquely am into my practice and integrate that into becoming a better person then I can raise the bar on my life.

That’s what this blog is for. To help us all navigate our relationships to ourselves, our lives and the law and seeing how they all intersect. I’m always searching for new and innovative perspectives. It’s a continuing process that, day-by-day, through expanding the purposes that work serves, we are able to build both a successful practice of law and life. Hopefully you can find an occasional nugget of truth here that resonates for you.

When we are living our best life, then we’ve raised the bar for the world. I believe hearing how we overcome challenges and self-imposed limitations are how we lift one another. I would greatly appreciate hearing your thoughts and ideas as well. Thanks for joining the conversation.

RECENT POSTS
Bottles of Life

Bottles of Life

Bottles of Life  Bottles of wines On a shelf Where they Come from I don’t always know At the table Rest glasses All sizes and shapes Some empty Others full Which do I drink? Betrayal, compassion Love, resentment? Each contains What will course through my veins As if...

Relationship Advice From a Lawyer — You’re Joking, Right? (Part 1)

Relationship Advice From a Lawyer — You’re Joking, Right? (Part 1)

If you go to Amazon.com and type in “Relationships” in the book category, you’ll find over a thousand books on the topic. Surprisingly, I couldn’t find one written by a lawyer.    Lawyers are hired to resolve conflicts and disagreements. Clients come to us to deal...

1 Comment

  1. jennifer Jefferis

    Jim, I love your capacity to capture these moments. How you take the time to be present with your family in such simple, precious ways. I admire your ability to love life, love your family, and adore your wife. Jennifer

    Reply

Submit a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

JOIN OUR COMMUNITY

Are you ready to integrate your work life and your personal life to make the best overall life possible for you?

Resources Pages Mailchimp Opt-in

This field is for validation purposes and should be left unchanged.

FOLLOW US ON

“I have followed Jim Dwyer for the past year. Jim is an incredibly skilled writer as evidenced by his book and prolific blog entries. Whether it is a simple conversation or blog – Jim makes you think. He invites you in and, through his rigorous honesty, encourages a discussion. He makes you question your own life, motives and actions. Lastly, through the use of descriptive language, you savor every word, with anticipation of his next entry.”

Wendy Votroubek,
LegalNursePDX.com

RECENT POSTS

Bottles of Life

Bottles of Life

Bottles of Life  Bottles of wines On a shelf Where they Come from I don’t always know At the table Rest glasses All sizes and shapes Some empty Others full Which do I drink? Betrayal, compassion Love, resentment? Each contains What will course through my veins As if...

Relationship Advice From a Lawyer — You’re Joking, Right? (Part 1)

Relationship Advice From a Lawyer — You’re Joking, Right? (Part 1)

If you go to Amazon.com and type in “Relationships” in the book category, you’ll find over a thousand books on the topic. Surprisingly, I couldn’t find one written by a lawyer.    Lawyers are hired to resolve conflicts and disagreements. Clients come to us to deal...

CATEGORIES

ARCHIVES